Catching Fire With Bare Hands
by Andrew-lee-Potts-Geek
Summary: Peeta Mellark has told their whole world that Katniss Everdeen is pregnant. They are about to enter the Quarter Quell. What if it is true?
1. Catching Fire: Chapter Eighteen

**Catching Fire: Chapter Eighteen**

. . .

Caesar and Peeta have been a natural team since they first appeared together a year ago. Their easy give-and-take, comic timing, and ability to segue into heart-wrenching moments, like Peeta's confession of love for me, have made them a huge success with the audience. They effortlessly open with a few jokes about fires and feathers and over cooking poultry. But anyone can see that Peeta is preoccupied, so Caesar directs the conversation right into the subject that is on everyone's minds.

"So, Peeta, what was it like when, after all you've been through, you found out about the Quell?" asks Caesar.

"I was in shock. I mean, one minute I'm seeing Katniss look so beautiful in all these wedding gowns, and the next . . ." Peeta trails off.

"You realised there was never going to be a wedding?" asks Caesar gently.

Peeta pauses for a long moment, as if deciding something. He looks out at the spellbound audience, then at the floor, and then finally up at Caesar. "Caesar, do you think all of our friends here can keep a secret?"

An uncomfortable laugh emanates from the audience. What can he mean? Keep a secret from who? Our whole world is watching.

"I feel quite certain of it," says Caesar.

"We're already married," says Peeta quietly. The crowd reacts in astonishment, and I have to bury my face in the folds of my skirt so they can't see my confusion. Where on earth is he going with this?

"But . . . how can that be?" asks Caesar.

"Oh, it's not an official marriage. We didn't go to the Justice Building or anything. But we have this marriage ritual in District Twelve. I don't know what it's like in the other districts. But there's this thing we do," says Peeta, and he briefly describes the toasting.

"Were your families there?" asks Caesar.

"No, we didn't tell anyone. Not even Haymitch. And Katniss's mother would never have approved. But you see, we knew if we were married in the Capitol, there would never be a toasting. And neither of us really wanted to wait any longer. So one day, we just did it," Peeta says. "And to us, we're more married than any piece of paper or big party could make us."

"So this was before the Quell?" says Caesar.

"Of course before the Quell. I'm sure we'd never have done it after we knew," says Peeta, starting to get upset. "But who could've seen it coming? No one. We went through the Games, we were victors, everyone seemed so thrilled to see us together, and then out of nowhere – I mean, how could we anticipate a thing like that?"

"You couldn't, Peeta." Caesar puts an arm around his shoulders. "As you say, no one could've. But I have to confess, I'm glad you two had at least a few months of happiness together."

Enormous applause. As if encouraged, I look up from my feathers and let the audience see my tragic smile of thanks. The residual smoke from the feathers has made my eyes teary. Which adds a very nice touch.

"I'm not glad," says Peeta. "I wish we had waited until the whole thing was done officially."

This takes even Caesar aback. "Surely even a brief time is better than no time?"

"Maybe I'd think that, too, Caesar," Peeta says bitterly. "if it weren't for the baby."

I have to hide my face again, finding the comfort of my skirt. This time, I am not hiding confusion; I am hiding the accusations of betrayal that my expression undoubtedly spits at Peeta. He has just broken a promise. Now the whole of Panem know.

My face will be the focus of most, if not all, of the big cameras dotted around the stage. And, for this reason, I stay buried in my skirt. The audience is in an uproar and the interview has come to a halt. Then the buzzer sounds which signals that Peeta's three minutes are up. I am too lost in my own head to notice that I have been crying.

All of the tributes are supposed to leave the stage at the same time, following the last interview, but Peeta sitting next to me fills me with so much rage that I want to hurt him. I don't hate Peeta, of course I don't, but I do hate what he has just exposed. On live national television, for goodness sake!

I don't have much time to think about what I am going to do, because I am already walking off of the stage, completely off script. The anthem blasts and I know that the programme has finished.

I don't bother to wait for Peeta before I take my place in the elevator. I shoot up to the twelfth floor myself.

The screaming of the crowd still rings in my ears and I can't decide what their reaction is. However, I do know my reaction. I am livid.

Now that the secret is out, President Snow has another thing to hold against me. He knows that if I want to protect our baby, I will have to comply.

I think to myself. _Convincing enough?_


	2. Catching Fire: Chapter Nineteen

_AN: Guys, guys, guys! I want to thank you ALL for following, reviewing and adding my story to your favourites! I have never had a response like that and I really want to thank you all. I was gushing last night when I saw all of my emails notifying me. Yes, I know it's only 18 or so but, that is the more than my first two stories together and then multiplied by five!_

_So, I don't like the way that the document turned out so the layout will be different. And, you may have noticed that most of chapter one – "CF: Chapter Eighteen" was mostly written from the book itself. That changes in this chapter. I know this chapter is fairly short but hey, ho. Enjoy my first EVER published chapter two. And thank you all, again!_

_. . . _

**Catching Fire: Chapter Nineteen**

**. . .**

When I reach the twelfth floor, Haymitch and Effie are waiting. Their faces are a blur through the haze of pooling tears in my eyes. I can't read their expressions but frankly, I don't care what they think. An arm reaches towards me and I scoot by it with an audible growl at its assailant. I do not want comfort and affection, I want to hiss and spit and scream.

It was Effie's arm. Haymitch waves it away from me with a warning that I only catch a few words of as I storm away, "best" and "leave".

_Yes, best leave me alone._ I sneer in my head.

Peeta Mellark, I hate you! No, I hate your big mouth! I hate the stupid connection you have with stupid Caesar Flickerman!

I walk down the corridor, away from the adults. I hope Effie Trinket tries to lecture me on how my manners, or lack of, upset her. I am in the mood to win that argument.

I stomp into the room that has been mine for the past year and yank the bolt into place. I fill my lungs with Capitol air and then scream until they burn, begging me to inhale instead. I'm sure every person for three floors, at least, has heard my outburst.

I strip from the Mockingjay dress, resting it neatly – because, at the moment, Cinna is the only person whose feelings I care about. I find the robe that I wore after my prep team finished with me in the dresser and make my way to the bed whilst shrugging into it. I collapse, sobbing on top of the mattress. I cry because I can, because no one can enter to try and console me.

How long I have cried for, I am not sure. I think it is late at night.

Peeta came to the door on more than one occasion. Other people have come too, even Haymitch. I ignored them all. No one has come to talk to me since and that, I am glad of.

I do not engage with the child inside me. I am not sure about it at all. Peeta was thrilled but me, I am terrified. I know that President Snow will hold this against me. I can't bond with something I am so unsure of. I don't want to love it for it to be taken, for it to break me. I always fear that this will happen with all of the other people that I love.

I think about mother, about how she has just, hours ago, found out that her eldest child has married and is now expecting her first child at only seventeen. I don't know if she will be disappointed or not. Perhaps she will only be disappointed that I never told her. Soft tears stain my cheeks. She also knows that I am going to die. I know I won't win the Games because I want Peeta to win. Now that everyone knows the big secret, I fear that they might pity me and sponsor me. No, it shouldn't be like that. I want them to sponsor Peeta. I start to sob again because this is not the way I planned it at all.

I cry long enough to tire myself out, enough to fall sleep.

. . .

I wake up screaming but Peeta isn't here to hold me.

Snow took our baby, ripped it from the protection of my stomach. I cry uncontrollably and for the first time, I comfort my tiny swell. I can't stop the tears that are falling again, and the images of Snow carrying out the procedure are burnt in my mind. For a moment, I wonder if it was actually the nightmare I believe or if, somehow, Snow has got inside my head to trick me, to warn me. The possibility alone terrifies me.

Breathing roughly, I get up and cross the floor. I unlock the door and quietly make way down the dark corridor to Peeta's room. I can't stay mad at him for long enough, especially not with how much I need him. Holding the robe across my body with one arm, I turn the handle with the other. It's unlocked, it always is.

He isn't asleep, of course he isn't, the Games start tomorrow. I pause to observe him as he draws, and after a few moments, he looks up and smiles at me. That beautiful smile. Those beautiful, soft blue eyes. I don't smile back at him. Not because of what he has done, more because I can't shake the thought of Snow in my head.

I also know that President Snow will never cancel the Games, just because poor Katniss is pregnant. I have a feeling that the Capitol and the districts might be rebelling against this, they are perhaps trying to change his mind.

Trying. I know that will never work.

Peeta puts his drawing down and rushes over to me. I try to avoid his gaze but he holds my face in both of his hands, I know he can read my fear.

"Katniss," Peeta whispers. "are you all right?"

I shake my head and lean into Peeta's chest. In an instant, my feet are off of the ground. Peeta is muttering apologies as he lays me on the bed. I don't let go and he stays down with me.

"It's not you," I start, my voice edging on the hysteria I feel. "Snow was in my nightmare." I tell him. This isn't news to Peeta so he waits for me to continue. "He took our baby." I continue, prompted.

Sobs shake my body and Peeta turns rigid against me. He doesn't like this any more than I do. "Katniss, no one will harm our baby," he promises. "no one."

I risk looking up from his chest. I see it in his eyes, amidst the tears, he means business.

I let Peeta hold me like he always does, it's comforting. His hand finds my tiny belly and he rubs it under the robe to soothe me. I smile at him, curling against his bare chest. He smells lovely – of whatever his prep team bathed him in. I'm so used to him smelling of bread now, not that I object, that this is a surprise. A surprise I have enjoyed every night.

He wraps the quilt around us both. This is how we sleep the night before the Quarter Quell, nightmare free, arm in arm, body against body. I enjoy the comforts of his arms and a bed. I know that this will be the last time for both words to be possible in one sentence.


	3. Catching Fire: Chapter 20

_AN: Guys! Thank you for the reviews and hello to new followers! So this has been a successful story so far! And thank you all again. I really appreciate it. I would also like to apologise for not updating sooner. But I have been so run off my feet with assignments and decorating! I hope you guys understand! I'm a student nurse and time is quite tight. Even more so after next week as I will be on placement for two or three days a week. And I just started a new job as a receptionist at a local Chinese. Pay is fair and it's e__nough to fund my car and other travels! Anyway! Enjoy and I will try and get another up soon!_

**C****atching Fire: Chapter 20**

I wake in the morning when Peeta's prep team opens the curtains. I guess this is a more subtle approach to waking us. No nightmares came last night, although I wasn't expecting them to since I was sleeping in Peeta's arms. I don't know how long Peeta has been awake for but his hand is soothing my tiny swell under the cover. This makes me smile. And then I lose the smile. Don't _get attached, Katniss._ I tell myself harshly, which is secretly breaking me. Last night, I allowed both of us to comfort our baby. It makes it all the harder to leave his arms.

Today, the seventy fifth annual Hunger Games begin. Today, I will continue to fight for Peeta Mellark.

Flavius grips my wrist and pulls me to my feet and out of Peeta's grasp. I scramble to hold the robe around my body and Peeta starts a protest but then Effie is standing in the door way, her voice chirpy booming – too much for the time I reckon it must be. "Up! Up! Up! We have a big, big, big day ahead." We both groan in unison. It saddens me to know that it will be the last time that we will be together in a bed.

Flavius leads me from the room, leaving Peeta to his prep team. I have to wipe away my tears away. I have to save my Peeta. But then I have the niggling voice in my head that is screaming at me to save our child, like I know Peeta wants. But save them for what? To watch them grow up in the world that I am experiencing right now? A world that causes innocent child death? I can't help but think of Rue whilst I am on this subject. She was so innocent and the image of her last moments stabs at me.

As Flavius leads me to my room, there is a tense silence. I know that I won't be able to take this like I should. They know that I am going to die.

Octavia greets me where she just breaks down in tears. It sets me off and soon, the two of us are in each other's arms, sobbing and apologising. Most of the morning is spent like this as my team try and get me ready for Cinna. We all cry and no one speaks. Although Venia does a great job of staying strong, even though I catch a glimpse of tears a few times.

At one point, Octavia puts a hand on my stomach. Really, I just have a bit of meat on me. It couldn't be passed for as being pregnant. This is how Cinna finds us, me sobbing as Octavia coos to my foetus. I must not think of it otherwise. Cinna scowls at the trio and sends them on their way.

"Katniss," says Cinna, his voice velvet soft. "I'm so sorry if they have upset you."

I shake my head and he wraps me in a hug. My arms tighten around his body. I don't want to lose this moment. In an instant, I start spluttering things about my plan to save Peeta to him. I know the trust will never be broken with Cinna. My sobs break up my words but I know that he understands the most part of what I'm saying. He just listens and that is all that I want. I am grateful that he doesn't try and talk me out of it.

I get dressed in thick but a seemingly light pair of grey combats. They have those huge pouch pockets at the knees and for a moment, I find this amusing. Next, I slip into a white thermal polo shirt. I let Cinna put my jacket on and he zips it over my small bump. He doesn't react, and certainly not in the way Octavia had. I try and push those memories to the back of my head. I check that my Mockingjay pin is in place and smile approvingly at Cinna. I don't mind this year's uniform but, it's comfortable.

Cinna takes my hand and I let him lead me through the quiet corridors of the Training Centre and up to the roof where the hovercraft is waiting. Neither of us speaks a word as we head towards the craft. I step on and am frozen in the beam as the careless nurse injects the tracker into my arm.

"I will see you soon. And sleep if you can." Cinna tells me.

Of course, I don't sleep. I'm too busy thinking about my suicide and my husband's pain. I know that he can't bear to live without him but he has no choice.

I think about the good times that Peeta and I have shared since the Victory tour. Being the first paired victors, everything was bigger than any other year had been. Every night since, we would fall asleep arm in arm. In fact, we had been with each other so much that now, I had an odd feeling. I was feeling alone.

I miss him.

Tears begin to fall in rapid progression. My emotions are everywhere but, I have to admit, crying does feel good. Unfortunately though, crying will not solve any of my problems. It doesn't even get me what I want. I want Peeta but instead, I find an Avox trying to console me. I send the girl away after a short time of her useless comforts.

I find myself thinking about President Snow and how coincidental this whole situation is. He wants me dead and what better way to kill me than to drop me, vulnerable, into the area. This Quarter Quell has to be a fix. No way was it already written, not after my humiliation to the Capitol a year ago. Sometimes, I find myself wishing that Peeta and I had just taken the Nightlock and ended it all there.

"Katniss," the voice behind me startles me into real time. "We're approaching the arena now." says Cinna.

I stand up, knowing what this means. I walk to the launch room with Cinna. Once we stop, he stands to face me and takes hold of both of my hands. "Show them what you have, Girl on Fire." He says and I reply with a half-hearted smile.

Thirty seconds.

Cinna smoothes out the jacket and hands me a belt which seems to have some sort of buoyancy features. This must be a joke that is on Snow. Fire and water. He wants to make a fool of me. And I just know that Caesar Flickerman will comment on the apparent dilemma. But I can swim. My father taught me in the small spring on our summer hunting trips.

Ten seconds

Cinna wraps me in a hug once again. "Stay alive." He whispers in my ear and I pull away without crying.

I step into the tube that swallows me and I am left to think about what Cinna has said to me. How can he say that after what I told him earlier? How can I stay alive if Peeta is to stay alive? Why doesn't he understand? The phrase does sound vaguely familiar and it isn't until the final count of the countdown that I remember these were Haymitch's words to me in my first Games. It is either a coincidence or a message. And I know that there are no coincidences when the Capitol is involved. It is a message.

Just like the message I find when I turn to Cinna to acknowledge him as I start to move up. In the eight or so seconds that I took to think, Cinna has been killed. And one of my own arrows harbours from his chest. Just like Rue. I scream and bang on the glass but I can't see anymore. Instead, I'm faced with a scorching sunlight. My podium is surrounded in water. Sea water to be exact.

I know that my ultimate punishment awaits me out there.


End file.
